Ask Doug 2

Originally written by Doug on 31 May 2005.
Let’s bust a cap in this janx, shall we?

Question from: George
How are you celebrating gimme-five’s second birthday? Also, what is your PR in the beer mile?

Answer: I was having a party with General Lee from beyond the grave which consisted of me running a beer mile in a PR of 3:35.14 (hand timed)

Question from: man hater
i know sometimes your relationship questions are pretty simply answered, but i’ve got a tough one for ya. i have been dating this guy ( we’ll call him bob) for over a year. Bob and I were high school sweet hearts, but now he attends Virginia Tech. He recently broke up with me. He said that it was because we fight a lot ( which i dont think we do) and that even though “he loves me very much and i mean everything to him” he thinks we would both be happier if we weren’t together anymore. It sounds like to me he is trying to give me the brush off in a way that i wont quite as hurt but he says that once we are both in a better place we’ll be back together and “everything will be fine”…..i need a man’s opinion….thanks a bunch

Answer: I know at this point it doesn’t really matter anymore, but for future reference i will attempt an answer. Let me first note “Bob”’s fatal flaw; he went to Virginia Tech. nuff said.

On the off chance that you are in high school (if you are in fact female, call 571-239-4250. CAUTION: VERY POTENT! ), your situation is nothing short of normal. Now, you have to understand that college is a life changing event for the majority of people. On the whole, i find that even the meekest of high schoolers can turn into the wildest of party animals, so i wouldn’t be surprised if Mr. Bob has made it with 20 some girls within a period of 5 minutes. So his reaction to break up is very natural and should not be perceived as a shrug-off, but more as a protection for you (unless you want to see the photos).

If by chance you are also in college, the case may be the same as above, however, another possibility also applies. He may honestly have feelings for you but doesn’t know how to cope with the distance issue. He should have communicated over a period of time this concern if he were truly honest.

Bottom Line: There are more fish in the sea. If it turns out you two are truly meant for each other, you’ll know after dating some random fools. And if all else fails, you can call that number i gave in the high school section…

Last Question from: your secret admirer
As the sexiest member of gimme-five, how come you don’t write much anymore?

Thanks for the complement, George. Well, i’m writing now, so PAY ME B*#@%!