This is the most hilarious video I have ever seen. Joe Mikulik, manager of the Asheville Tourists (what a name), got a little ticked off about a call on second base. And by a little ticked off I mean he started kicking up dirt and throwing bases in an out-of-this-world tantrum. Hilarious.

He dived into second and pulled up the bag before throwing it into right field. By the time he got ejected, Mikulik was just warming up. He covered home plate with dirt and cleaned it with a water bottle, which he spiked on the plate. From the dugout, he threw bats onto the field. “I don’t think I ever lost total control, though it may look like it,” Mikulik told the Asheville Citizen-Times. Mikulik was hit with a seven-day suspension and $1,000 fine by the South Atlantic League.

According to what I saw on ESPN this morning, the NFL has banned pretty much all touchdown celebrations. Sportscenter had an interview with Chad Johnson, who claims that they will not prevent “The greatest entertainer of all time” from entertaining (or something along those lines).

What does this do for the NFL? Almost everyone loves watching touchdown celebrations. They’re entertaining, they’re (for the most part) funny, and they give the NFL something to differentiate them from college football. The NFL is not a upstanding moral organization that is trying to pass down life’s little lessons to its viewers. No way! The NFL is an organization created to entertain viewers and make money. And touchdown celebrations entertain people, and they encourage more people to watch, thus making more money for the NFL through advertisements, product sales, etcetera.

[NFL Commissioner] Paul Tagliabue thinks he can now stand around pretending he is saving the world from moral injustice and poor sportsmanship, when all he’s really doing is getting rid of one of the best parts of every football game, the touchdown dance. Don’t do it, Paul, you’re only hurting the league you claim to love so much.

Guest Article by Jon

It’s awesome to be writing again for a website that nobody reads… really I’m thrilled. Anyway here’s my running diary of Friday’s action of the NCAA tournament modeled after the good stuff that Sports Guy used to write before he stopped being funny about a year and a half ago.

I’ll be watching the games alone today as I’m lazy and don’t feel like driving anywhere and my TV sucks so nobody will come here. Yesterday I watched the afternoon games with Ian, who openly pondered why Coach K’s hair length hasn’t changed in the last 20-25 years (we determined he either gets a hair cut every two weeks OR he’s wearing a rug - I’m betting on the former), and I watched the evening games with the young bucks. A few thoughts…

Guest Article by Chris: I thought I’d offer a little insight into my decision process concerning the NCAA basketball tourney.

Rule 1: Don’t pick UConn (or insert your favorite team) to win. Just because, I’ve followed the Huskies all year long means that a) I’ve seen all of their losses and b) know all of their weakness. Now, that I know they are vulnerable to a team with a lot of slashing cutting players (Villanova) and they have trouble scoring at times (Syracuse), I can’t imagine them winning it all. Probably overanalysis. Also, if they win it all, who cares about the bracket?

Rule 2: Don’t pick Duke. Why give yourself a reason to root for them?

Rule 3: Don’t pick bad Big East teams. Yes, Syracuse and Seton Hall that’s you. Just because you beat some people in the Big East tourney, doesn’t mean you won’t get upset in the first round. Go whine somewhere else Jim Boeheim.

Rule 4: Stay away from teams that start with a “K”. Kentucky and Kansas, shudder. Who wants them to win?(I certainly don’t)

The Washington Nationals are homeless no more. Major League Baseball and the DC City Council have reached an agreement to begin construction on a brand new ballpark in Southeast. Nevermind the sign outside of RFK Stadium declaring it to be “The Home of the Washington Nationals.” That stadium is old. How is baseball supposed to sell the Nats off to new owners without a deal in place for a brand new stadium? No investors will want to buy a team without a stadium. I mean a new stadium. If Washington wants to keep the team, the city will just have to build a new stadium for them.

RFK is an old stadium, and certainly could be replaced, but there’s really no urgent reason to build a new stadium now, before the owners are even selected. Well, no urgent reason other than the profits that the other Major League Baseball owners stand to make from the sale of the team.

The Nationals are collectively owned by Major League Baseball. In moving the team from Montreal to Washington, the DC City Council signed an agreement with MLB in which they promised to publicly-finance a brand new stadium for the team. I’m not interested in debating whether or not DC got a good deal in this specific case. The City Council must honor its commitments, regardless of whether or not the deal was in the city’s best interests.